TPEP: Day 47…
Posted by: Zen | January 27, 2013
TPEP: What is missing… Day 47
Beside the money I had hoped we would have to enable this to be a reasonably comfortable trip. Sigh, Otherwise…
We have been cruiser now for over a month, with a two month anniversary coming up in 2 weeks. At that time we will be settled in Mexico for the next three month…maybe.
I would not say the trip has been all that much fun, not un-fun! Just not FUN! As with everyone all smiles, like what is in the Mags. This is real cruising, dealing with weather windows, cold nights, low money funds, etc. I am becoming of the mind that the trip “there” ( where ever there is ) is not so much fun as being where one is going…”there”. All about there , not getting there. Much more about where you are going, than where you are.( Way off the Zen philosophy of enjoying this moment…seriously off ) Then there are costs, which are not much fun, but it can be with the right mind…or money. Anyway this is why all the articles, post , pictures are about where said cruisers are ( and drunk or drinking) rather than the trip there. Then that would depend on your where pleasure zone is. Mine is in a warm zone, with mild winds and following seas. But… I am digressing…and it could just be me.
I have enjoyed the breaks from the travel. Especially when there are places where I have friends. Monterey, Long Beach was great, good weather , friends, Chan, Kyudo, transportation, although temporary . It was still good. Getting the passages between those places behind us was most enjoyable, not so much the passage , but getting it behind us. No motor noise, warm food, a glass of wine, not dodging crab pots, or sea kelp. Ahhhh pleasure. It is kind of like sticking one self with a needle to feel the pleasure of stopping. Extreme in the example but you get the idea.
So whilst out on the deck today I thought , what is missing here. SAILiNG came the answer, as the fog rolled in from the masts of sailboats docked across from us. I had yet to really sail, there has not been a time that we have moved that it was not under power, there was a short while we did sail that lasted about 1 hour. I do not recall all the reasons, part was not to slow down our buddy boat. Mostly it had to do with the lack of wind. Sailing is relaxing, even though work. Motor sailing is tiring, the motor noise, listening to any changes in tone that signals sometime is wrong., looking out for crab traps, kelp…etc. there comes a time where you just say ok, frack, I need to chill out, if it is going to happen , my worrying will not stop it. Still in the back of your mind there is the motor drone… Maybe it is just me though.
Anyway I believe if I could do some sailing I would enjoy the passage more along with having a working auto pilot. that alone maybe be huge!! Having Feeling I am harmony with the elements, that gives one more of the feeling of not aloneness ( if the motor dies, nature is with you.) , of being connected to the Tao, and flowing with it, rather than being this noisy object, running off dead reptiles.. I would have felt much more connected to the dolphins we saw under sail, than under Honda….Maybe it is just me though.
In port it is the thought of what needs to been done for the next leg, how much is this dock going to effect our limited budget, or is the anchor holding, do we have enough for food, money …
I played my flute today, my first time doing so on passage. It was good therapy. I have not been able to do any Tai Chi, I still get in my Chan Ding (Zazen) , but that lack of physical release and deep moving breath is not the same. Of course playing is completely another realm but parts of everything overlap. I need to do it more…Here it is the breath, the control of breath, plus the transfer of that breath into sound, that sound effects the body, the spirit, it is a cycle of chi like sitting Zen, at the same time like moving Zen, Tai Chi. I guess the common element is the breath and the movement of Chi and the change from one energy form to another….or maybe it is just me.
As I prepare things on the boat and in my mind to leave this brief haven, as I re-center, I give thought to all that is involved with we’re we are and are going. Thoughts turn to all that I have and have not. What, why , how.
I would love to just have a peaceful sail, instead of working to move. I look forward to a regular pattern of training, even though irregular patterns are also training. There will be time in Mexico , I will just need to find a place, to train. I need wood-shedding on several levels. This has been only phase one of this inner exploration and outer journey.
The I-Ching says San Diego would be successful /comfortable, something like that for me. Yet I can do well in Mexico with correct behavior. If we are going to grow and experience we need to step outside our comfort zone, I know this. This is part of the Spiritual aspects of this passage, trust in the Tao to provide, like the biking monk from Korea. So Mexico will be our home for the next three month. It should be interesting. We have our basics covered, beyond that…there is only trust.